Reader Question:

I was matchmaking my personal present sweetheart for four many years and had been pretty happy with our union. I just became truly close to this some other guy who’s a pal. We constantly talk and consider him.

I am aware we both share feelings for each additional, but neither people has completely accepted to it because we know Im in an union currently and that We nonetheless like and also thoughts for my personal present sweetheart.

Will there be an easy way to assist figure out who is correct for my situation in this situation?

-Ashley (Indiana)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Torn between two men. This is the story of a lot an intimate comedy and classic unique. The woman has a perfectly suitable sweetheart and in treks a dashing new man just to generate her hot hook ups, bothered and completely confused. Rest easy, you, Miss Ashley, aren’t the very first lady to have trouble with this problem.

Whenever I found myself personally in such a pickle, I would just take pen to paper and write lists of pros and cons about each guy, answering articles and columns and, well, becoming more confused. Because, honestly, this really is impractical to examine familiar, stable and comfortable to interesting, brand new and hazardous. Both involve some alluring powerful points.

I will inform you this: the partnership that is right for you personally may be the one you may have with your self. Will you be being the sweetheart you’d like to get married at some point? Are you currently managing your self in a manner that holds compassion for both men? Have you been teasing the brand new man with no explanation except your pride? Could you be beginning to inform white lies towards boyfriend so you can get to be able to encounter Mr-New-And-Exciting?

The relationship that is correct for your family will be the one you create proper. I would start by making correct with your conscience. Break-up, if that’s just what has to take place. But don’t remain on the fence too much time, or perhaps you might be pushed off and secure on prickly part.

No counseling or therapy advice: This site cannot give psychotherapy guidance. This site is intended only for use by consumers searching for general information of great interest related to problems folks may deal with as individuals plus in relationships and associated subject areas. Material isn’t meant to replace or serve as replacement for expert consultation or solution. Contained findings and views shouldn’t be misunderstood as particular guidance advice.